I apologize for not doing a tour wrap up sooner because I am sure of one thing... I forgot a lot of things. This tour was probably one of the most fun tours ever. No rock star bullshit, just legit dudes everywhere. I would like to thank Matt Devries (guitar chimaira) and Adam Dragon (Video director - killswitch engage) for keeping me entertained a.k.a. drinking for the majority of the evenings. I fear that I would not have survived without you guys. And Chris (Samples - chimaira) for keeping the sloppy joes flowing. Enough of the sappy shit, lets get down to the stuff you guys want to hear about. Awesome days of mention:
Record Release Day - chimaira - the infection: During the day I was asked by Mark (chimaira singer) to print up flyers and put together a raging party to celebrate the release of their new record "the infection". Not a usual task required of a guitar tech but I promptly responded, "No problem". During my adventures throughout the arena hanging flyers and spreading the word, Dan (guitar player for disturbed) hits me with, "reprint the flyer!!! change the venue to our dressing room and tell em we'll supply the booze." Not a problem. To anyone who has never done an arena tour, the headliner's (in this case disturbed) dressing room is ridiculously nice. That night the rock show happened and everyone was looking forward to this raging party coined to be starting @ 11 pm. Immediately upon our fashionably late arrival, Dan grabs us all and throws what he refers to as an Oatmeal cookie shot (Ingredients: 3/4 oz butterscotch schnapps, 3/4 oz Irish cream liqueur, splash of Jägermeister, splash of cinnamon schnapps) down our throats followed by the quote "5 of these and you guys arent going to remember a damn thing!!!". These things are delicious, challenge accepted. The party was a rager!!! Everyone gave it their all. The next morning Rob Arnold (LEAD!! guitar player chimaira) put it best by recalling his last memory of the night as him yelling to Dan, "Hey this is #5 and I haven't blacked out yet!!!"... Blackout immediately followed that liquid touching his tongue.
Disturbed Bowling Day - To show their appreciation for the great success of the tour, disturbed rented out a bowling alley in Omaha. We put in a little pre-game drinking at Buffalo Wild Wings while I watched the first 2 periods of Game 7 Boston Bruins - Carolina Hurricanes. Then we made our way over to the bowling alley. When we showed up David (singer disturbed) was already well underway with the bowling. We got our shoes laced up and began to bowl. Let me go back to noon time this day real quick when I called the bowling alley and asked the 400 year old woman who answered "Will you have the hockey game on the tv tonight?" Which she answered, "I dont see why not." So after I situate myself I proceed to older than dirt woman at the desk to please change the channel to hockey on VS. channel 216. Which she responded, "Honey, we get channels 1 - 7!!!" and of course there is no cell phone reception to keep up on my phone..... FUCK you OMAHA!! So I proceeded to bowl and bug the one guy who's phone was working to get me updates. The Boston Bruins lost in overtime at the exact same time a ice cold bottle of jagermeister was placed in front of me to ease my sorrow. And ease I did!! I dont remember much of the night. I do remember my bowling abilities going to complete shit and throwing balls down other peoples lanes. How I got home is still a mystery. The fact that I made it my 8 am massage appointment still amazes me. I must have smelled like a brewery. Sorry to you Ms. Masseuse if you happen to be reading this.
NEXT Day - MAAW 4 - Council Bluffs IA - This is the very next day after the bowling extravaganza. I am not doing good. It is raining which I consider fitting after the events of the previous evening. But wait...a ray of sunshine, there is a hooters about 100 yards away from where the bus is parked. I LOVE HOOTERS. So I wake Matt (guitar player chimaira) out of bed and force him to go with me to hooters immediately because if i dont get fried chicken in me soon, the hangover is soon to begin. Half way through the meal, the fog in my brain is starting to clear and I think, "Hey I should invite some of these hooters girls to the concert". For no other reason other than it was our turn to throw a dance party that night and who likes a dance party full of dudes. 6 girls agree to come. They show up after our concert and they head immediately to the bus for the dance party. The night was going great. The booze was flowing, the people were dancing, and then it happened... Matt informs me that a hooters girl just stole a 12 pack of beer off our bus. Dont get me wrong. I understand it is only a 12 pack of bud light but my following action were based on principal. If you invite someone into your home (in this case tour bus) and give them food and beer and act hospitable all night the last thing your expect is for one of those people to try to steal from you. I immediately run off the bus and see this female scumbag standing outside saying goodbye to our sound guy. She has no 12 pack on her?? So I sit back and watch quietly. As she reaches the back of the trailer she pulls 2 (1 hers and 1 ours) 12 packs out from under the trailer where she had hid them. I spring into action. I run after her and at this point she knows that she is caught. I politely ask her what the fuck she thought she was doing and immediately start to berate her about how fucked up her actions are. I snatch our 12 pack out of her hand and in the same motion throw a front kick into her 12 pack, which knocks it out of her hand and smashes all over the parking lot with the parting words, "Now you have NO beer!" That was a fun one :)
Again tour was great but I am super happy to be home. I do miss Tom Dice a lot though. If you dont know who Tom Dice is, feel free to google it. The man is a legend.
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